I made this new single serving Tumblr blog of girls selling thrift store clothes at vintage prices.

GIRLS OF EBAY

This time it’s about fashion.

And the word “emerate”.

Fucking hipsters!  God.

[via LATFH (archives)]

DAYDREAMS:

“Young Hank”
Manhattan Bound Q Train
Hoodie: Jimmy Jazz’s
Parka: Jazzy Jim’s
Daydreams: The crowd shields their eyes from an intense industrial glow from the stage.  Oversize fans in the corners of the warehouse whir, bending shadows, and weed-smoke billows from the crowd.  Everyone is dressed like angels.

Young Hank walks in slow-motion to the edge of the stage appearing as a muscular silhouette to the crowd.  His arms shoot up as the beat drops and the angels in the crowd begin to bounce.

Their halos melt over their faces and harden.  Each one of them screaming in ecstasy as the bangin’ bangin’ beats steam their blood, mixing with the weed-smoke.  Young Hank inhales and smiles.  Shaquille O’Neal spins onto the stage in a brown Tasmanian Devil tornado.  He has Method Man in his backpack.  Method Man hops out and takes Raven-Symoné and a MacBook Air and a cracked version of ProTools and delivers the noise.  Beautiful Orlando-purple noise.

After a furious freestyle session (touching on such topics as pimping, long-division technique, Nair, sluts, farm-to-table restaurants, and President Obama’s invisible puppy) Method Man sails into the stars in a rocketship, and Shaquille O’Neal and Young Hank pants Russell Simmons** and melt into the floor.

The angels slurp the mess that Shaq and Hank created and pack themselves into a ‘96 Escalade and ghost-ride the whip through the white part of town.

[END]

NIGHTMARES:

“Cal ‘Venom’ Hagelstein”
34th Street Station

Jacket: Army Navy + Hand Painted Detail
Jeans: Arizona Jean Co.
Duffle: Promotional Nutri-Grain Bars Duffle Bag S/S ‘02
Nightmares: The cops are surrounding the basement of Cal’s parents’ house.  He can see their shiny shoes through the eight-inch-tall windows.  Don’t you dare look at me with your little pig-eyes, he whispers through his teeth, his palms leaking sweat - staining the leather grip of the antique Civil War-era saber in his hands.

Seven Abe Lincolns are doing shirtless pushups on the carpet.  They are circling him and whistling that Peter, Bjorn, and John song in time to their mechanical exercise.  Cal just ignores them.

The cops surrounding the house begin to shout.  Shout.  Let it all out.  These are the things I can do without.  Come on.  I’m talking to you.  Come on.

Cal, forced to defend himself, his dignity, and his seven pet Abe Lincolns, runs to the computer room and waits patiently as the modem spits and gurgles.  Hello.  He’s got mail.

The instructions are vague, but Cal is a warrior.  An American Nightmare.

They read:

1. Swallow your pride
2. Choke on the rinds (but the lack thereof may leave you empty inside)
3. Swallow your doubt
4. Turn it inside out
5. Find nothing but faith in nothing
6. Put your tender heart in a blender
7. Watch it spin around (until well blended or beautifully oblivioned)
8. Rendezvous

The instructions close:

Through with you,
Dr. Martin,
(Your Freshman-year Creative Writing/Poetry Professor)

Cal begin to cry as the cops climb out of the printer/scanner/copier/fax machine combo and arrest him.  The seven Abe’s don’t even lift their heads to whistle goodbye.

[END]

** upon researching how to spell Russell Simmons’ name I discovered that he has the same birthday as me.  Russell:  Joint party at my place in the fall?  Txt me.

So I must admit- I love many things purple. Growing up, my bedroom was purple (with a chartreuse ceiling, black trim and black carpeting), I wore purple Doc Martens, dyed my hair purple for my 8th grade graduation, wore various shades of purple, and only ate purple foods. That last part was a lie, but sounded so good. I wish I thought of it back then.

Anyhow, it’s hard for me to resist all things purple. Even though I recently condemned Lady Gaga, I have to say that I might have a change of heart, looking at this recent photo of her new haircut/color…It’s all about the tips here, and I really like what I see.

This weekend was awesome! It was such warm weather it almost felt like Spring! To celebrate, we went out for some soul food …

Yum!

Next we went shopping for a “man purse”. Apparently this was something my fella was really excited to find. The words “man purse” made me laugh. I was pretty skeptical.

We went looking at a couple of places, and then went to the Army Surplus. I have to say, the Army Surplus is a little creepy. At the one we went to, they were selling trigger-finger mittens with some mysterious stains.

But then we found this sexy little map holder that was perfectly manly and purselike at the same time:

What do you think?

We’ve already been over the fact that I’m not fashionably inclined. There are people (read: sympathetic girlfriends of mine) who try to convince me otherwise, but the truth is that basically every day I wear a man t shirt, pants, and the snow hat that Mike P. left at my house on accident. I’ve tried to, uh, “refeminize” my style lately, like the time I went to Williamsburg and hung out at Oslo wearing a bright yellow dress and a woolen navy stage cape. These attemps are few and far between. Also they are not successful.

This afternoon I decided I would buy a trendy spring shoe. You know, something that can be paired with a cotton frock or dress up a pair of skinny jeans!

I started looking online at my favorite boutique, Payless Shoes. They didn’t really have what I was looking for, which is: something kind of trendy that gives you a minimal amount of height that’s not a gladiator sandal (really? gladiator sandals again?).

I decided to soldier on to a more high-end retailer, Nine West. There were some boots on there that I liked a month ago, so maybe there’d be something good for spring. There were a lot of platforms, extremely high heels, and boots with no fabric around the actual foot, only the leg. At this point, I realized I needed professional advice.

Me: What’s a good spring shoe for some1 who doesn’t want a big heel
Me: Or gladiators
Me: I want something springy
FancyPants: Casual?
Me: Yeah, everyday
FP: Just flat sandals
Me: Like what
FP: Rachel Comey makes nice ones
FP: Shopbop has good sandals
Me: I never really wear sandals, dunno why
Me: OMG this website is confusing!!!!!!
Me: Ok found shoe section
Me: Am BBMing progress
FP: Great nyerd
Me: Oh cool, I can just make my sketchers peep toe for an awesome spring trend.

Trends for spring from shopbop.com:

My current favorite pair of shoes, these handsome Sketchers:

My soon-to-be spring-trend shoes, courtesy of MS Paint:

Payless can keep it’s $29.99. I’m a frugalista.

I’m a firm believer in using clothing as a form of expression.  So, moving forward, I’m going to try and wear what I love most…ummmm……Cats!!!!!

Check out the new, New Look:

Squid Earrings: $11.00

Turd With Eyes/Cat Face Necklace: $24.99

Mega Fantastic & Magical Cat Tee: Can only be bartered for with a human skull, a gold tooth, or some weed.

Kitty Printed Keds: Can only be bartered for with an authentic pair of ’80s L.A. Gear sneakers.

Achieving Ultimate CAT MAMA Status: $$$$$$Priceless

Prada’s thigh-high wader-boots, the furry cardigan, the embellished dress, and the money to buy them all. Wait, that’s four things…I lied. And yet, there’s more to come…

But seriously, isn’t it nice to be recognized by your peers? I think of Refinery29 as the coolest club in school, and they just did a little write-up of my Fall 09 Collection for Duskin. Check it out here.